Who Am I?
I have experienced three deaths in the past nine months, the loss of my full-time job, the loss of my part-time job, and the loss of my dreams. The most significant loss was my new husband to colon cancer and all the dreams associated with him. I am still unemployed after 4 months and unable to find work. I struggle to maintain my tithing, which is so important to me. I am unable to give to others financially like I would like to. Jobless, husbandless, broke… who am I?
After my husband passed away, I was able to keep busy by focusing on my two jobs and full-time school. Six months passed and I lost my full-time job. The next month, I lost my part-time job. The next month, I graduated from college. Now I am at home alone, forced to face the question, “who am I?” I am naturally a giving person. But over the last couple years, God has humbled me and put me on the receiving end of things. The enemy has attacked my mind to such an extreme that I wondered if I am worth anything to anyone. How am I serving and making an impact for Christ? Why can’t I find a job where I can “show my stuff?” When will I ever be able to see a need and simply pull out the checkbook? These things make me feel good as a person. How can I be significant at this time in my life?
All of these questions have bombarded me and I have sincerely doubted my very worth to continue on this earth. There have been some very dark days. Recently, I just had to cry out, “Lord, I need You! What is it that I am supposed to know from You?” Simply, God responded, “Who are you?”
In my fit of anxiety and depression, I have to ask myself this question. If I cannot be something to someone else or helping someone else, do I still have significance? The answer is a resounding, “Yes!”
It is very easy to wrap our identity up into what we can do for others. But God does not require this of us. Because we accepted Christ as our Savior, God accepts us just as we are. There is nothing we can do to make Him love us more. Isn’t that freeing? It just sounds too simple, but it is true.
The things we do for God are an outpouring of our love for Him, not a requirement for Him to love and accept us. God’s Word talks about our identity in Christ. We are:
a new creation (2 Cor. 5:17)
salt of the earth (Mat. 5:13)
light of the world (Mat. 5:14)
a child of God (Jo. 1:12)
a friend of Jesus (Jo. 15:15)
chosen to bear fruit (Jo. 15:16)
set free from sin (Rom. 6:18)
sons of God (Rom. 8:14)
God’s temple (1 Cor. 3:16)
one with the Lord in spirit (1 Cor. 6:17)
reconciled to God (2 Cor. 5:18)
redeemed and forgiven of sins (Col. 1:13-14)
COMPLETE (Col. 2:9-10)
The key here is that we are complete in Christ. Even though I have nothing to offer physically or monetarily at times, my significance does not lie in those things. My significance lies in my identity in Christ.
The loss of identity and purpose can be devastating. For those of you who have experienced loss in your life through death, divorce, job loss, or any other loss, I implore you to say along with me, “I am complete in Christ.”
Prayer: Lord, you know the burdens I bear. You know the pain I feel. I cannot go through this loss without You. I feel that I have nothing to offer anyone at this time. I pray that you lift my spirits and remind me that I am complete in You. I don’t need approval or affirmation from anyone else because of who I am in You. Thank You for the reason I am completely accepted, Christ Jesus. Amen.
Copyright 2009 From My Heart To Yours